21) NOT COMING SOON ENOUGH. It may appear to you that humping
for an hour without climaxing is the mark of a sex god, but to her
it's more likely the mark of a numb vagina. At least buy some
intriguing wall hangings, so she has something to hold her interest
while you're playing Marathon Man.
22) ASKING IF SHE HAS COME. You really ought to be able to tell.
Most women make noise. But if you really don't know, don't ask.
23) PERFORMING ORAL SEX TOO GENTLY. Don't act like a giant cat
at a saucer of milk. Get your whole mouth down there, and
concentrate on gently rotating or flicking your tongue on her
clitoris.
24) NUDGING HER HEAD DOWN. Men persist in doing this until she's
eyeball-to-penis, hoping that it will lead very swiftly to
mouth-to-penis. All women hate this.It's about three steps from
being dragged to a cave by their hair. If you want her to use her
mouth, use yours; try talking seductively to her.
25) NOT WARNING HER BEFORE YOU CLIMAX. Sperm tastes like sea
water mixed with egg white. Not everybody likes it.When she's
performing oral sex, warn her before you come so she can do what's
necessary.
Page 2 40 MISTAKES MEN MAKE WHILE HAVING SEX WITH WOMEN 26)
MOVING AROUND DURING FELLATIO. Don't thrust. She'll do all the
moving during fellatio. You just lie there. And don't grab her
head.
27) TAKING ETIQUETTE ADVICE FROM PORN MOVIES. In X-rated movies,
women seem to love it when men ejaculate over them. In real life,
it just means more laundry to do.
28) MAKING HER RIDE ON TOP FOR AGES. Asking her to be on top is
fine. Lying there grunting while she does all the hard work is not.
Caress her gently, so that she doesn't feel quite so much like the
captain of a schooner. And let her have a rest.
29) ATTEMPTING ANAL SEX AND PRETENDING IT WAS AN ACCIDENT. This
is how men earn a reputatio n for not being able to follow
directions. If you want to put it there, ask her first. And don't
think that being drunk is an excuse.
30) TAKING PICTURES. When a man says, "Can I take a photo of
you?" she'll hear the words "__to show my buddies." At least let
her have custody of them.
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